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tension awaiting imminent collapse
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| july 2003 - october 2005 |
[18 Oct 2005|04:12pm] |
i'll never forget this place. apt 210 was what made toronto bearable. the first time i went to europe on my own, in fall/winter 2002, i was seriously considering moving there. i was so sick of the t-bag that i was ready to bail. i was bored, lonely and jaded, and anyone who's ever spent more than fifteen minutes in hogtown can relate, i think. when i got back it was more of the same, until i ran into b & z at a demo against the war in Iraq. pretty soon i had moved in, and suddenly i was able to accept toronto as my home. fucked up as it was (is) i realized that it made more sense to get involved, try to be a part of making it a better place to live, than to ditch it and run away to somewhere i had to start fresh. and our little house of ill repute in parkdale was a huge part of that realization.
i'll never forget the music, the shows (near and far), the parties, all the awesome meals, all the late-night hijinks, wrestling chicken bones out of murphy's mouth at the park, or the new-year's day LOTR marathon this year. i'll never forget the visitors, who slept on our couches and made it with the dog (all of them - whether they wanted it or not). this isn't making much sense because i have to run, but i'm far away now, back in europe (but not for good) and i miss you three like hell.
so here's to the good times, which all must come to an end, and forget about the bad ... it's been rad.
---
p.s. for future reference :
http://www.myspace.com/32245666
http://blog.myspace.com/32245666
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| crying won't help you, praying won't do you no good |
[19 Aug 2005|04:36pm] |
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music |
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led zepellin "iv" LP |
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calling in sick and enjoying the downpour (fire escape door open, sitting here safe and dry) today is definitely one of the best calls i've made all summer. doesn't hurt to have such awesome company, either.
normally, i'd go in to work on a rain day, just to get paid for NOT cutting grass. but i hit the snooze button one too many times, and the sky just opened up ...
so instead k and i planned our trip. dublin to barcelona in two months, with plenty in between. she'll hit the emerald isle with friends three weeks before me and i'll stick around for about a month afterwards in the motherland. i'm fucking crazy stoked. the only thing i'm seriously bummed/worried about is leaving the band behind for so long. seriously.
yeah i haven't updated in a fucking crazy long time but all in all the summer has been just grand, thank you very much.
i think i'm going to go swimming tomorrow. and to dairy queen. but right now, sitting out here, waiting for the levee to break, is pretty fucking perfect.
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[20 Dec 2004|04:27pm] |
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music |
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victims "harder than it was meant to be" EP |
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i positively hate everything right now, but not this. the best part is towards the end, so watch the whole thing.
in other news, i have way too much christmas/life crap to do, and no will to do it.
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| on through the dead of night. |
[15 Nov 2004|01:49pm] |
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music |
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dystopia "human = garbage" LP |
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so this past weekend i went to Philly with John and Emma to see Uncurbed, World Burns to Death, Kegcharge, Star Strangled Bastards, Endless Nightmare, and Krumbums.
it was an awesome show. it pissed down rain all night, that made things crappy a bit. oh and the drive was really long. oh and we almost didn't have a place to stay, because Endless Nightmare's van broke down (again) somewhere around Providence. but Ben from Dropdead drove them all the way to philly, and they made it just in time to play before WB2D, right after Uncurbed. Mike plugged in his guitar head and it went "poof!" though. sparks shot out. sucks.
we stayed at Shawn and Ned's house and it was great. we went to a party at the Robot house and i drank alot of beer and Emma found us a joint and then i was suddenly aware of how fucking exhausted i was, and we managed to grab Mike's key and go home and i passed out in my Mummy Bag (which i love almost more than life itself). the next morning we lazily went to Whole Foods (where i will never go again, unless it is to steal) and then got huge burritos and eventually got on the road for home. emma drove the whole way there and back, she's rad. home around midnight.
then i woke up on sunday and my throat was sorer than a motherfuck. did i mention that both John and Emma were sick? well, i've got it. the throat soreness has subsided slightly, but i ache all over and i'm totally congested and i generally feel like crap-ola.
but the show was awesome. Uncurbed played "Riding on the High Life" and they got their old second vocalist (i think) to come on stage (he was working the merch table) and sing it in T.B's place. oh and also they played "Revolt", the old Asocial song, which was amazing.
WB2D were amazing. especially their drummer, who also drums in Kegcharge. holy fuck. heaviest kick/floor tom sound i've ever heard. maybe i can get them to play "Wretched Sons of Kursk" when they come here on friday. i really hope they make it accross.
so yeah. i hate being sick, but i love Swedish and Texas d-beat!
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| dead to the world. |
[05 Nov 2004|06:01am] |
it's called either HYPOsomnia or HYPERsomnia, and it's taken over my life every winter since i was seventeen or eighteen.
maybe i'm just coming up with a big word for being a lazy bastard. but i know alot of lazy bastards, and none of them can comfortably sleep between 10 and 12 hours EVERY DAY. seriously. the only alarm clock i really listen to is my bladder. my bladder and my stomach.
the sun will be up soon, and i will be asleep for a long time.
fucking useless.
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| all across the nation. |
[13 Oct 2004|06:17pm] |
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music |
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sacrilege "beyond the realm of madness" LP |
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fall is back. my hands are wind-chapped and cracking.
the weekend was awesome, but i think i'm a bit showed-out. friday CURSED opened for Darkest Hour. CURSED were awesome, but they suffered at the mercy of the Kathedral sound guy, who seems to only be in the booth when he feels like it. for a band that have such a thick, heavy low-end growling wall of terror for a sound, it's a shame that they had to be put through the board and have the guts ripped out. Darkest Hour sounded better, and their energy was pretty awesome for the first half of their set, but towards the end i got a bit bored. just wanted to go home and listen to At the Gates in peace, where i wasn't in danger of having my face caved in for standing too close to the floor-punching, crane-kicking, dick-measuring contest.
saturday night was the last RIOT 99 show ever, as Drew was leaving town. it was sad to see a five-year fixture of the toronto scene go, but we had fun. plenty of singalongs, stage-dives, pile-ons, etc. i also don't feel so bad about it due to the fact that so many great bands will be stepping in to fill the void.
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i have been sleeping in alot since my job ended. this really can't become a habit, like it did last year around this time. must stay productive!
things to do:
- work on PPM bike project with Fraser and Netami.
- design my first tattoo.
- cut my hair.
- overhaul my hubs.
- tear down my old trail bike and convert it to single-speed via pvc piping.
- write new CONCRETE TANK songs.
- practice ONE HOUR EACH DAY.
- gain a sense of discipline.
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thanks to Simon for burning this record for Zoë. it's awesome, but suffers from the one criticism i have of nearly all 80's crossover/thrash records - fucking vocal echo effect! so stupid! it sounds like the singer is my drunk neighbour, yelling down the hall of my apartment building, shouting at me to turn it down!
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| some get by but some get old. |
[07 Oct 2004|09:03pm] |
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music |
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nick drake "five leaves left" LP |
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first fall was here. it was chilly outside, and windy, and leaves were falling from the sky. overall i began to get the sense of urgency i normally get around this time of year. the feeling that tells me to dig in or get gone. it's scary, but i don't mind it. i've never had a favourite season. my favourite time of year is every time that the seasons change. so summer to fall was awesome. i could smell it. i was wearing a scarf.
but yesterday spring came back.
and it was stupidly balmy today. the perfect temperature for riding around, for both getting shit done and sitting on a patio, drinking coffee and reading a book. which i like. BUT THAT IS WHAT MY SUMMER WAS.
seriously, i can't figure this out! i bought and altered a new fall jacket! i was planning on reading something seasonally appropriate (cozy and scary) and packing away my shorts! going to Fraser's cottage and telling ghost stories and NOT getting sweaty in my sleeping bag! what the fuck?
where the fuck is fall? it's fucking OCTOBER !!!
motherfucking tease.
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| riding hell's stallions, bareback and free |
[01 Oct 2004|05:17pm] |
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music |
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burning kitchen "damn if you do, damn if you don't" EP |
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so i got a digital camera for my birthday. it's awesome. my mom got it with airmiles. i will tell the story of the past week-ish in pictures. or i'll try.
Mackenzie came for a three day visit on sunday. we rode bikes around and had good talks. i really have to tear down my old road bike for him to take back to montréal.
we played this show on saturday night. it was great. it was Zoë's 29th birthday at midnight, and it looks like she's experiencing a divine apparition as we're playing. fucking crazy. the endless blockade were the best i've ever seen them. watchmaker i didn't see too much of, as i was on door duty. then RAMMER went on. this says more than i ever could in words. oh, and i realized that this photo could accurately be titled "seanjohn". i kill myself.
seriously, though. they covered VENOM. i screamed along like a motherfuck. lay down your soul indeed.
the next day, we had Zoë's birthday barbeque at Bennett's dad's house. photos: Ryan . Renee . Dave . Dave and Murphy . the hot tub !
fuck yeah.
then tuesday was my last day at work. things i'll miss : making a shit-tonne of money for putting up with relatively little bullshit, seeing the sun rise above the eastern end of queen street while riding to work in the morning. things i won't : dealing with fucking idiots who drive 20k below the speed limit at all times and always have to have things repeated when they clearly understand already, being called a "rat" by a paranoid neanderthal and nearly opening him up with my utility knife, cleaning up shit, vomit, used condoms, syringes, blood, etc. things i'm looking forward to : employment fucking insurance.
i've been searching for a good fall jacket for a long time. i went to black market on the weekend and they had a rack of nice twill eisenhowers for $20, but they were all dark green. then the girl behind the counter said "why don't you just buy it and spend four more bucks and DYE it black?"
so that's what i did. and i put new buttons on it and a patch i got at the Relapse store when i was in Philly for pointless. i'm very happy with the way it turned out : front . side . back . i'm going to get a liner, and maybe make it zip-in.
whew. done. now i have to go eat something, change into crappy clothes, and wheat-paste this all along queen street.
p.s. the Bayonettes play ladyfest toronto tonight. awesome.
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| i've got the power, i've got the speed. |
[22 Sep 2004|03:41pm] |
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music |
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bad brains "s/t" LP |
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from CONCRETE TANK's first show, at the Planet with Under Pressure.
more later? now, i have to run, as i am headed to Buffalo to see SKITSYSTEM.
best year of shows ever.
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[16 Sep 2004|08:22pm] |
yesterday i had three wisdom teeth removed. it cost a total of $1039. thank god i have a dental plan through my work which will pay 75% of that.
my mouth hurts but tylenol 3 helps. i have to rinse alot and take antibiotics. when i got home at first i was horking huge gobs of blood and mucous into a bowl. then i discovered gauze. not the band. the fabric.
being back at my parents house for a few days is semi-weird. but i was able to eat the quesadillas my sister cooked for dinner tonight, by chewing on the left side of my jaw, and that was good.
johnny ramone is dead. christ.
this weekend i am determined to finally be productive. silkscreening and bike maintenance.
i don't suppose anyone has a lightly used 7 or 8 speed dura-ace rear derailleur they want to sell me?
didn't think so.
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| in the gas chamber of commerce |
[07 Sep 2004|11:42pm] |
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music |
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ümlaut "finland" EP |
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four day weekends fucking kill!
i haven't updated in goddamned for ever, so this one's loaded with crap. or rather pictures.
first things first. this is Murphy. he is a 13-month old Rottweiler/Golden Retriever cross, the only black puppy in his litter. he is amazing. so much fun to cuddle. a big suck. he also suffers from accute separation anxiety whenever our busy lives lead us elsewhere for a few hours, and we often return home to find some element of the living room in six million pieces. but we love him.
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about two weeks ago, we (concrete tank) played our second show EVER. this show.
i arrived a bit late, around 8.15, and everyone was still bringing their gear to the Oasis. Ben recruited me to go and help get bastardizer's gear from the space. i needed something to occupy my nerves, so i hopped in Bickles' car, and we coasted through the non-traffic of monday night all the way to Geary. luckily, Radowan had decided to help by bring the CURSED van, and Josh, who really shouldn't have driven due to his lack of sobriety, had his car as well.
everything was going fine until Ben and i attempted to load Andy's bass cabinet into Bickle's hatchback. basically, Ben lifted one side, and didn't really explain what he was doing or how he was doing it, and then when i didn't match his lift, he kinda dropped his side, and my side slipped, and, well ... Andy's cabinet came crushing down on my right foot.
that, i think, was the low point of the evening for me.
yeah. everything else is gravy once you've managed to crush your foot.
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show starts around 10pm. i'm under the impression that odesa are an improv grind/metal band whose lead singer is obsessed with all things Russian. he makes awesome sounds with his guitar, the drummer does the same, and he randomly screams/shouts things in Russian. it was better than i thought.
then we played. the energy was good, people were into it, but we screwed up the intro to the first song. my left forearm and wrist started to ache into the third song (must learn Andy's excercises), and that made it hard to keep up from then on. Zoë sang really well. Ryan drummed like crazy. we pulled it off. we screwed up a bit, but we pulled it off.
pictures : one . two . three . four .
before bastardizer went on, dave showed us a stage trick. then they went on.
holy shit. did they ever. best i've ever seen them. for their fourth or fifth show, they are seriously pretty fucking awesome. they've finally honed their sound, everything came out just right. and by "just right" i mean heavy as a motherfuckbut still distinct. great presence, barely any pauses. they killed.
pictures : one . two . three .
finally, kylesa set up their gargantuan stacks of gear and collapsed into a great set. the levels were much better then when i saw them in Philly, and it works so much more. they have great stage presence, and in such a small, intimate space, you really do get just a little bit scared by the gloomy, sludgy wall of death falling out of the cabinets and drowning the room. i think the disposable that Zoë bought was running out, because there were only two or three pictures of them. this is the best, i think.
pretty fucking good show, for a quiet monday night at a shitty bar in Toronto. thanks to Zoë for the pictures.
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in more recent news, my birthday weekend was a blast. had not one but TWO great nights of dinner and drinking with friends and family. got awesome records from Bennett and Zoë and Mark and Mary-Anne, a great book (also from B&Z), a neato card from Cheryl-Ann, sweatshop-free t-shirts from my little sister, an ice cream scoop and a digital camera from my parents.
oh yeah. you heard me.
an ice cream scoop. look out, twenty three.
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| summertime, and the living is easy |
[13 Aug 2004|09:53am] |
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music |
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nick drake "tannworth-in-arden" LP |
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fish are jumping, and the cotton is high.
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in fifteen minutes i will be in the rental car with Keith, Andy, and Geocylene on the way to Philly for POINTLESS FEST!!!
i will scream/growl along to Disfear for all of you jealous motherfuckers.
yeah.
ha ha.
fuck the border.
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| but if you wanna find hell with me |
[09 Aug 2004|04:38pm] |
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music |
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teen cthulu "ride the blade" LP |
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i think this band is supposed to be scary, but the organ keeps reminding me it's only music. only music. i can wake up any time.
you can have all the splatter pics that you want on your record ... if you have organ bursts in your otherwise pummelling, awesome and collapsing songs, well ...
it conjures unfortunate images of the Phantom of the Opera, or something.
they are, however, chanting "everyone. dies. al. one."
which is semi-redemptive.
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the weekend was fucking great. we went to Mark's cottage, near Paisley, ON, on the Saugeen River.
in groups of awesome threes :
Bourbon, a Tractor, and an ill-fated game of Risk.
Onion Rings, French Fries and unreal Sun Burns.
Canoeing, one very anxiety-ridden Dog, and a trespassing Peach eating session.
Motörhead, Beer and Bocce.
Gasoline on a raging fire, a walk in scary Woods, and a sky crammed with Stars.
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in a few hours i will be at the Cure show (with Mogwai, Interpol and the Rapture) at my least favourite of venues, the Molson Amphitheatre. that's okay, though. i've never seen the Cure, and i probably won't ever see them at a smaller venue, so whatever. i'm curious about Interpol, as well.
it don't seem like it, but i am quite excited.
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in more hardcore-related news, it looks like i might actually indeed be able to make it to Pointless Fest, as Keith has said he will rent the car and drive. so rad. if anyone wants a ride, and is willing to -ahem- pony-up, tell me so.
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i should go. i just went and got calomine lotion for B, who is in extreme pain, due to his whole-body sunburn from saturday. i hope my feet (which look like two well-boiled lobsters) are not next in line.
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| because it's judgement that defeats us. |
[04 Aug 2004|08:17pm] |
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music |
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skitsystem "ondskans ansikte" EP |
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for once i'm home and it's just me and murphy and i've decided to just get some things organized, rather than go to a dinner party and come home late and feel like shit at work tomorrow. i have to make lists. lists of appointments to make, projects to begin/finish, and things that MUST get done before winter sets in and i go crazy and hibernate again.
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the show on sunday was so much fun. we fucked up a bit, but the beauty of a first show is that no one knows your songs well enough to spot the errors. the planet was stinking hot, and i don't think i've ever sweated so much in my life, but i guess i should get used to it, seeing as we're playing the horribly ventilated Oasis on August 23rd with KYLESA !!!
holy fuck. better practice.
oh yeah, and Simon wrote a small review of our show inside of a larger journal entry concerning going to Montréal with Warcry and coming back here with Under Pressure. the review is awesome, especially the part where he refers to my bass playing as "thunderous Lemmy-Costello" or something. i can honestly say that that is the highest compliment i will probably ever recieve, where music is concerned.
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oh geez. for some reason, Simon's journal has been deleted. that is stupid.
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i think i will cook something, and work on my lists while watching one of the following :
1. city of god (again - this time sober though)
2. style wars DVD extras
3. the office, season one "making of ..."
always able to find some way of slacking off.
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| OPEN SEASON ON HECKLERS. |
[30 Jul 2004|12:02am] |
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music |
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countdown to oblivion "the death rattle" DEMO |
] |
it is far too late and i'm going to be useless at work tomorrow, but what to do people think of this poster (below the cut) ???
p.s. yes this is our first show. i'm shitting myself already. everyone should come.
( check it out ... )
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| and it's where we live |
[28 Jul 2004|12:57pm] |
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music |
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action - s/t LP |
] |
it's very exciting that these kids have finally released a full-length. it sounds great. they played well last night, despite being out of tune and having their guitars turned down way too low. oh and the usual teenage violence making it hard for me to watch the band from a comfortable distance. whinge whinge whinge.
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last night WARCRY played one of the tightest hardcore sets i have ever heard, it was an awesome wall of d-beat radness. they stayed here and were all totally rad. i thought they might be weirded out by Murphy's impulsive puppy behaviour, but they totally loved him, Todd especially. i hadn't realized how fucking huge (physically) that guy is.
i called in sick. i have so much time to do whatever i want, it's great. errands errands errands.
this morning i asked Brad how From Ashes Rise got "that amazing hollow sharp snare sound" on the Silence record, and he was like "i hate the production on that record. everyone hates the production on that record. you're the first person who has said they like that production ever." and then he told me about the ridiculously cheap skins they had on the drums, and the trashy monitors, etc.
i still think it's my favourite Portland d-beat record, production wise.
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Bennett's official birthday was rife with bullshit, but i think we managed to make the best of some crappy situations. between inconsiderate arrogant assholes and Murphy chewing record sleeves, it was rough sailing, but i hope he feels a bit better after an amazing show and hanging out with nice kids from the mecca of North American d-beat.
happy birthday indeed.
---
i drank a shit-tonne of espresso and i can't think straight or sit still. must ride! new tires and bar-tape ahoy!
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